Posted 2006-10-01. Tags: asylum, ryanxpromise, tales, usa.

Upstate NY, Connecticut and Massachusetts are full of mental asylums. Maybe the US has more crazies per captia than anywhere I've heard of, or perhaps they are simply quicker to institutionalise people.. either way there are tons of abandoned (and fucking partially active) asylums around the place to poke around in and explore. The problem is that everyone else likes to do the same so most are locked up super tight and vigilantly patrolled. Adequate care and running shoes are recommended.

I met up with local nutcase ryanpromise, one of the most active and photographically inclined explorers in the region. If I didn't know him, I'd think he was an asshole. Hell I do know him and I think he's an asshole. A fun adventurous asshole however, so we got along just great. The drivers in this area are, to be blunt fucking shocking. I would be scared to put them into dodgem cars let alone absolute command of a motor driven vehicle with gears and steering ability. I'm talking drivers so bad they could crash trains on separate lines into each other.



Also they're not just bad, they're AAAAAAGNRY drivers as well. One distinct incident comes to mind. Hurtling down the highway at some order of magnitude above the speed limit a truck cut us off, forcing us to brake suddenly. Now Ryan is a great believer in conserving momentum so as you may expect this drove him into a tremendous rage. He swore profusely, slammed the steering wheel and repeatedly punched the horn. I quickly learned he's not one to be content with a mild venting of his frustrations. As quickly as the opportunity was presented to overtake the truck my window was rolled down in preparation for starboard fire. We drew alongside the truck and unleashed a fury of glass bottles upon it. Satisfied our disdain for said truck drivers ability to maneuver his vehicle has been demonstrated we continued upon our speedy way. As I said, fucking vindictive assholes.



The standard conversation while driving went thus:
ryan: reckon I can make that gap?
ds: (not looking at all) dude, easy!

I would look up a few seconds later to see us speeding towards an ever closing gap between 2 vehicles (cars, trucks, motorbikes it matters not), often closing to barely above a car length just as we swerved through it. This became a fun game, I'd say "Sure we'll make it" on principle then see how late I could look up and still avoid shitting myself. Good times.

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